So last few years L Bird and I haven’t really done anything on St. Patrick’s Day, but this year we decided to do it up big with a local pub crawl. Our friend “Luci” basically strong armed the Knights of Columbus into sponsoring a pub crawl. Once that was set, L Bird found bright green sweatshirts that said “Official St. Patrick’s Day Drinking Team” and everyone in our little group bought one and ironed on letters with our nicknames on the back. Let’s just say L Bird was a little iron on letter challenged. They weren’t the best iron on letters anyway but L Bird has little in the way of patience so she had a few missing spots in her letters, but a big bottle of white-out took care of that problem.
Yesterday we drove into town and hooked up with the rest of our group, Captain Insano, Luci, Twin, Stick Bug, and Kielbasa at the K of C. The pub crawl started at 3 o’clock so we spent the first few beers at the K of C, then the canon fired to announce the start of the crawl and we were off. Our first stop was Eddie O’Briens. The place was packed, but we managed to fight our way to the bar. L Bird was too short to force her way in for drinks so we jammed Stick Bug/Skinny Bitch (her other nickname) into the bar and told her to order Labatt Blue Light, she orders the drinks and turns around and hands us green Bud Light bottles. Gross. But there is no such thing as bad beer, only better beer, so we drank them down. Then the Captain pulled a typical Captain move, he cuts a green balloon a chair and spent what felt like 20 minutes tying his perfect boy scout knot around L Bird’s wrist. So we are drinking and Kielbasa takes the balloon off L Bird’s wrist and hooks it onto his ear. In the matter of seconds the balloon comes off Kielbasa’s ear and starts to float away in the restaurant, Captain jumps to catch the balloon and falls into a high top table and completely levels it. Condiments go flying, the table tips over, the chairs scatter everywhere, but he “saved” the balloon. Making sure the balloon was secured the Captain picks up everything and puts it all back together and we promptly leave.
We are a few more bars down, when we hit Trotta’s. Trotta’s is not as packed but still had a few pub crawlers in it. It was an older clientele so it was pretty low key, or so I thought. The bartender came around with a tray of jello shots, so we do a round of jello shots and a couple of beers. The song changes and the bartender turns it up and jumps up on the bar and starts dancing. Then the next thing I knew a bunch of people were on the bar and the bartender was trying to coax L Bird up onto the bar. For whatever reason she wouldn’t get up there until the Captain said he would get up with her. It was awesome!
After the dancing we hit another round of free jello shots, then I stepped into the men’s room to break the seal. Tell me what’s wrong with this picture:
Yep, someone misspelled “Employees”. Nice.
Next we hit Pinky’s Bar where we had another highlight. A bagpiper walked in had a drink and played a couple of songs.
After that we finished our beers and made the rounds through Beef N Brew then back to the K of C for dinner. We ate dinner, then made our way down to the Sideshow for the rest of the night. The Captain and I played pool and mellowed out talking to a few hippies we were playing pool with. The final highlight of the night when the Captain completely wigged out this poor bastard. This kid comes walking through the bar wearing a bright green sash that says “Kiss Me, I’m Irish”. I look at the kid and then at the Captain and I say nice and loud “Hey Captain, he’s Irish and you should kiss him” The Captain starts toward the kid with his lips puckered up and the get rips of the sash and shout “No, No I’m Jewish I’m Jewish” while running from the Captain. I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes.
L Bird and I finally called it a night and headed home around 1:30 AM. Overall, it was a great St. Patrick’s Day with a lot of friends and a lot of fun. I’m already looking forward to next year!
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